So they say God works in mysterious ways. In the case of my dream, he can be exceptionally direct at times. A dear friend needed a helping hand. This friend did not ask for special favors. I just saw their obstacles and decided to offer my help. I felt God brought her into my life to teach me something that I needed to learn. I don’t have many friends and the few I have are very special to me. I had prayed and meditated on my actions and felt helping was the right thing to do. I did not want nor expect to ever be paid back. I just felt that God wanted me to help and I cared about this person.
Needless to say, our friendship had a bad day. I have had disagreements with friends before, even arguments and fights. But true friends don’t quit. They fight for each other and for their friendship. In a single night my friend cut me off completely. I prayed and sought solace but nothing helped. For almost a month I put myself through Hell as I second guessed every decision and every conversation I had with this friend. I despaired, blamed myself, blamed my friend, and asked God why he would bring me into someone’s life to help them only to be abandoned abruptly.
A week before the dream I recognized the Hell I had created for myself. I imagined Satan gleefully toying with my emotional state like a puppet on his strings and asked for God’s help to banish him from my heart and send him back to the Abyss. I incorporated that plea into my daily prayers. Never once did I stop praying for my friend. I will pray for my friend until the stars burn out, asking for God to watch over and heal her.
Then I had my opportunity to talk to the big guy one on one. It is weird the questions you choose to ask in this situation. I felt like I asked a hundred but each question went down a different rabbit hole. Finally, I asked what I did wrong to my friend? Was there anything I could do to fix this situation or would trying to fix it just make it worse? His answer: “She is on her own journey”. That’s it. Simple. Sweet. Direct. It took away all my grief, doubt, and despair in one fell swoop.
The resounding messages from my first book were two fold. First, Imagination and Will can change the world. Second, you cannot save another person. You can help others. You can bend over backwards, swim across a river of lava, and move heaven and earth for them. However, in the end, it is their decision and their life. You cannot take that responsibility away from them. They have free will and they are the sum of their parts. Give what you can, be there for them with sound counsel and as a shoulder to give them support when they are down. Understand that their journey is their own. Love them regardless of their mistakes and keep them in your heart and in your prayers. Even though my friend left me, I would not trade the wonderful time and effort I spent helping her for anything. Likewise, she shared a part of herself with me, taught me how to fish, and showed me incredible generosity and confidence of spirit. Helping her was its own reward. That’s what friends are for.